The Quest for Indifference

I am tired of the word ‘tolerance’. The dictionary records several meanings of this particular word- which now includes ‘acceptance’. To me, however, it means that someone does not agree with my ‘lifestyle’ but that they permit me to live it. And I have not asked for society’s permission to live my life in any way, shape or form. So, as far as words go- ‘tolerance’ is not my favourite.

The reason for my rant on this glorious day is the continued refusal of the United States of America to legalize same sex marriage. The right to marriage is a basic human right (Article 16 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights) - this is being denied to certain humans because society only ‘tolerates’ gay relationships. How can this be right? Or righteous? Where is the outpouring of outrage from the South African gay and lesbian community? Where is our Martin Luther King?

I have a dream, where a man or a woman will be judged not by the sex of the person they love, but by the content of their character.

Or are gay women and men not seen as equals, but rather as oddities, stereotypes, or eccentrics to be indulged? Are our private lives so unfathomable, that we are a mockery to the heterosexual world, and therefore are not entitled to be equal before the law or afforded even the most cursory of common courtesies???

Allow me to demonstrate the standard introduction of me to random strangers by acquaintances and (now disowned) family members: “Hey everyone this is my cousin/ sister/ friend/neighbour, Rae. She’s a LESBIAN.” This is usually followed by aforementioned total stranger calling Rae the Lesbian aside and saying:” I don’t mean to be rude, but what EXACTLY do two girls DO???” which is either answered by a secretive little smile or with a very hostile: “Dude, rent a porno, already.” But I’m just rude like that.

My request to the world at large: Be indifferent. I do not want to be the ‘gay girl’. I want to be just a girl. Who just happens to love a very beautiful girl and who has a little daughter and a crazy cat.

I am a Christian, a card-carrying, choir-singing, go-to-church-every-Sunday, honest- to-God Christian. So let’s address the one issue that people have with same-sex marriage: it’s not biblical. Slavery was Biblical, indeed Abraham/ Avraham/ Ebrahim the great and holy patriarch of three religions owned slaves. Apartheid claimed to be biblical! Polygamy is biblical. Stoning of adulterers is biblical. And the list continues…

So, where does that leave us? We can no longer be silent while the world denies us our Human Rights: The right to be equal before the law. The right to marry without coercion. The right to belong to a family. The right to freedom of association. How long before South Africa repeals these rights too?

Stand up and be heard!

“All that is required for evil to prevail, is for good men to do nothing”- Edmund Burke