There has been a recent song that got me thinking about what success is. Its called 22,by Lilly Allen the opening lines caught me by surprise and a range of emotions went through me.
Here they are, I have added the feminine to it:
When she was 22 the future looked bright
But she's nearly 30 now and she's out every night
I see that look in her face, she's got that look in her eye
She's thinking how did I get here and wondering why
It's sad but it's true how society says her life is already over
There's nothing to do and there's nothing to say
'Til the wo/man of her dreams comes along
Picks her up and puts her over his/her shoulder
It seems so unlikely in this day and age
Why did this affect me so? Was it the fact that I often feel inadequate because of career choices I have made and I am nowhere near where I want to be (be assured it IS in the wings though) and there I am, single (way over 30). There I was driving to Cape Town and it felt like I had kicked myself in the guts. The next day I sat in a favourite spot next to my River and thought about the emotions and did a little evaluation.
How do I define success what is it really? I have a beautiful home next to a river, I have a stable job, two smart daughters who are beautiful adults, a car to drive, am healthy and actually happy to be single. Now if anyone else would read this they would already say “Hey you ARE successful” and I am HAPPY – YES – gee, and that’s what it boiled down to. I was evaluating myself ever so briefly by other peoples standards, societies expectations of what success is and the woman in the song suddenly had my sympathy because you and I both know that she exists. And this is what I will sing to her:
When she was 22 the future looked bright
But she's nearly 30 now and she's out every night
I see that look in her face, she's got that gleam in her eye
She's thinking I got here and I know why
It's brilliant and it's true how society does not really count
There's nothing to do and there's nothing to say
because she is the woman of her dreams and has
picked herself up and put her life in her hands
It seems so unlikely in this day and age
Define your own success, live your own life as authentically and truly as you can because is not already over, start today…
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