Cape Town Lesbians

Satan's Package

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 A Facebook friend left the following comment on my wall the other day:

"My girlfriend is an 'ex-miracle'. Her step family used to parade her around to their circle of churches and proclaimed to anyone that would listen that she was "HEALED" of being a lesbian. I have since been called (by these same family members) "SATANS PACKAGE". I have to wonder at their arrogance - they proclaim an all powerful God, and yet don’t trust him enough to create people as He sees fit.  They feel that they need to spend their lives trying to 'fix' what He created so that we all fit into perfect Christian-shaped blocks to make THEM feel acceptable. If God wanted robots he would have created robots... a whole world full of happy-clappy, heterosexual, hymn singing, judgmental Pharisees."

Very true, very fitting and very well said.

The topic was the fallacious and facetious "ex-gay" movement which is spreading its own brand of lies and deceit around the world - and recently in South Africa as well - and it seems to me that this alone is deserving of the label "Satan's Package". They - the perpetrators and the willing and duped victims - of this deceitful scheme who claim that gay people can be made straight through no more than prayer, despite all the overwhelming evidence to the contrary - including the testimony of the entire psychological fraternity and the masses of people who have tried this "pray-away-the-gay" nonsense and fallen out along the side of the road and spent years trying to piece their shattered lives back together again - or become suicide statistics because of it.

But leave them be... let them make their false claims, for even the most ardent "ex-gays" know the truth – that they are still and always will be gay. That their claims to be "cured" of their sexual orientation and identity is a lie and that the only reason they claim to be "cured" is because they believe that being gay is somehow "wrong" and that they have simply capitulated before religious intolerance and fundamentalism. And that they too will one day fall out of that closet once again, this time never to return. And then they shall look back at the work their misguided hands have wrought - and the misery they have helped to bring unnecessarily to others like them. And with great sadness, they will look at their hands and see the blood that stains them.

And no, I'm not sure I will pity them on that day either.

As I have said many times before - the only true "ex-gay" is a dead gay. And the only true motive such a movement holds for "turning gay people straight" is religious intolerance. And the only "help" it offers gay people is to help itself by ridding the world of gay people by turning them into shattered wrecks and to neutralize them by either self-denial or suicide.

Last night my girlfriend pointed out another similar concept she found on the web to me - on a religious self-help website:

"Stop masturbation addiction using the bible."

Huh?

How? Do you strap it on to your nether regions?

Some folks use this cro- I mean, crutch to control their gambling or drug addictions, others to control their porn problems - and so to them it seems to make perfect sense in their all too limited knowledge and obvious ignorance that being gay is therefore no more than an addiction as well, which should obviously (duh) be treated as a controllable urge. I suppose these same folks would say that being left handed is also wrong and an "urge" that can be cured by prayer. It's a good thing I don't have a masturbation, gambling or porn addiction. Or a bible lol. Because if some idiot were to say such ignorant things to my face I doubt holding a bible would restrain my urge to thump them with it.

What does a person's sexuality have to do with them anyway? What harm does it do to anybody, and specifically to the gay or transgender person - or to anyone else? Aside from cryptic and idiotic claims about gay people being "pedophiles" or a so-called "threat to 'the family'" or "civilization" they cannot produce even one tiny shred of fact or evidence to back up such utter nonsense.

Personally, I would urge such people to "pray away the fundamentalism" or the "bigotry", or the "heterosexism", or even the "hypocrisy" - because such things truly are harmful - to everyone.

Which brings me to another thought provoking question - I'm an agnostic, but if I were also dyslexic - would I lie awake at night wondering if there is a dog?"

Christina Engela
South African Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (SA GLAAD)
Email:  This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it
Website: http://www.saglaad.org

Comments
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:)
Tass (196.36.8.xxx) 2009-07-31 18:53:59

Nice to see you here Christina, love ur articles and writing...
Great!
Tanya (198.54.202.xxx) 2009-08-06 14:23:56

Thanks for that Christina,
Someone who is not afraid to promote discussion or reaction.......

I PRAY that you will write for CTL again!

T x
Kat (165.233.50.xxx) 2009-09-22 11:14:28

K .. how to do this without pissing every-one off is tricky...

As I was reading your article it became more and more difficult not to skip sentances. to be honest this subject has been the same for as long as existance of gay.
Yes it is wrong of people to judge.. yet are you not doing the same as they are.. judging them and their motives, thought process, conclusions ... judging even thier ability to think...
Yes it is wrong to think that any one can know what God wants or even what God is... yet are you not doing the same thing by speaking on behalf of Him... saying that if He wanted this ot that it would be so... We are all human with the need to love and be loved.. that is in the fabric of our existance... that is a fact .. God.. He.. She.. It ... my understanding of a Higher power is that of love regardless of my expectation of this Power...please do me a favour and stop indulging in inhabisions because statements and articles like this 1 is one sided, be it from anti-gay or pro-gay its all the same if one tries forcing an idea on the other .. the point is we need to stop judging and start loving ... and the best place to start is within one's hart.
@Kat Stand up for yourself and represent
AgentL (196.46.71.xxx) 2009-10-07 16:01:40

I appreciate your objectivity, but with out articles like these there would only be articles from the fundamentalists promoting "pray the gay away". (Which is completely ridiculous praying doesn't work; I have been praying to win the lotto for years now and so far... not much.)

I think it is important for each side to be able to put their views out there. Anybody who is really interested in trying to make up their own mind would read both, (this assumption is based on the premise that people have an open enough mind to question things – even if it means questioning something you were taught never to question). It is also my experience that people were preaching and teaching anti-gay from every where in many different forms. Never once did I meet a person who tried to convince me in the street to be gay. For myself and I am sure for many others only with the advent of the internet were we finally given our own soap box. Whether it is just to say, “This is my point of view - please respect it.” Or whether it is being used to say, “You are wrong mate, back off.”

Sometimes expressing oneself (however one-sided) is a form of self love that comes from the heart, possibly (and hopefully) teaching other people that, though they have been judged by others it is still ok to be different. Not only ok, but fabulous. This is our soap box. This article may seem one sided, but it is really just a reaction to a wide spread one-sided-fundamentalist-judgment, that certainly didn’t feel like it came from anybodies heart when you are on the receiving end of that judgement.
There's a thought.
kat (165.233.50.xxx) 2009-10-12 13:08:30

I fully agree with you that it is insane to think that what we are, can be 'prayed' away... that is very narrow minded. I do not agree that praying does not work because of my own experiences .. but this is not about praying.. this whole debate comes down to one thing... no-one on the face of this planet has the right to judge another... for anti-gay protestors to even get together with biscuits and tea discussing how they can stop this sinful idea of being gay to me is the same as a nutter sitting in her nut house thinking she will one day be the president of the world... its just plain dumb... but at the same time I feel that we are a community of intelligent, talented and resourceful people who can, as you say think for ourselves... then why do we .. and I say we as I do it as well ... fuel the monster as it were by attacking or judging those same idiots that think this 'pandemic' can be prayed away... why do we lower ourselves and our spirits by trying to prove them wrong with more accusations... to expose the gay community is the best way of helping others understand us more ... it's a fantastic tool, but it becomes a useless one none the less when we lower ourselves to that kind of judging. Monotony is not my cupa. I challenge you to start a debate where straight and gay can come together on an even playing field and discuss the true nature of the straight communities issues with us... and the same challenge go to straight peeps reading this... come up with new questions... listen and digest the answer before you give a reason why it is wrong... bring on the freshness peeps!
An example
AgentL (196.46.71.xxx) 2009-10-12 13:41:22

Cool. You start, give us an example of a new or fresh question and lets take it from there.
kat (165.233.50.xxx) 2009-10-12 15:55:30

I would start it off with something simple like why is it important to discuss what happens in a 'gay' persons bedroom as if it were the only noticeable thing or attribute about this person? No-one does the same with straight people...yes they discuss sex but not only that and definitely not as if that is all that exists in this wonderful world of ours… why are we separated with one prominent subject in our lives?
yes spirituality and sexuality are integrated and most people in my opinion can become boring in bed because they focus to much on what they believe their Higher Power would do or say about it ... why not separate the two ... ?

Maybe im pulling at strings here but I really believe that we can make this work somehow.

up for intelligent debate
cathwrynn (196.215.49.xxx) 2010-06-22 12:21:04

I am always keen to engage with issues of sexuality, spirituality, social acceptability....

Kat are you suggesting seperating spirituality and sexuality?

i would love to 'talk' about this idea...i have a lot of ideas bubling up!

Just want to make sure i know which thread you are suggesting... please post more....
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